April was a busy month for me in many ways, but more importantly it was a month where I had to sit back and re-evaluate what I could reasonably expect from myself and what I wanted to achieve. I was invited to Emerald City ComiCon by a good friend of mine and had a good time not only at the con, but also visiting Seattle which is a lovely city. My sister actually moved in with me this month which tied up a good deal of time as we were pretty much moving her things by ourselves and negotiating all our furniture and belongings, which is still being sorted to be honest. I also had my occasional bout of malaise sweep in and that never makes me want to do anything, though at this point it’s just feeling like a hollow excuse. Related to some of these events are a few realizations I’ll be writing about later, but for now I want to focus on my goals.
I haven’t actively been pursuing any of the goals I set up for myself in some time and looking back I’m not feeling very good about that. I’ve been especially bad about working on my debt and I really can’t justify that kind of irresponsibility anymore. It’s been distressingly easy not to think about the goals I set for myself for 2016 because I don’t actually face the reality of them everyday for the most part. I don’t have the list tacked up somewhere in my room or on my phone (I’ll be changing that). I don’t have some count-down set up for the end of the year or a schedule written up for completing each goal by a certain time (Definitely should work out something like that).
I think I’ve mentioned I struggle with procrastination and a defeatist attitude. I don’t think crossing off my goals for 2016 will automatically change who I am, I’ll always struggle with those sides of myself. It will mean that I’ve learned how to work around those problematic parts of myself and that’s definitely an accomplishment. Also finishing things feels good so I absolutely want to do more of that.
One of the big things I’ve been slacking off on are my blogs, particularly Otakraft. Crochet and crafting in general bring me a lot of joy and I haven’t been posting because I haven’t been doing a lot of it. But I think part of the problem was that I was expecting to much of myself. Honestly two posts a week wasn’t realistic considering I have a full-time job and things can get pretty hectic. Even if I carve out twenty minutes a day to crochet or spin or whatever that’s generally not enough content to do two posts a week unless we’re talking about some pretty lackluster updates. So I’ve decided to pull back a bit and go back to one post a week. I think I’m learning towards Tuesday and Thursday posts, but I’m still tweaking the posting schedule so that might change. As for this blog I’m going to continue the goal of once a week posts here as well.
Expect regular updates again starting this month and I’m hoping that I’ll be able to post about some crossed off goals soon!